Wednesday, February 15, 2012

about him.

We're so excited to continue to grow our blog, reach out to those who are adopting from Bulgaria, and edit our blog to include more information and pictures as we expand our reach to friends, family, and others.  As you can see, I have added a photograph to our profile.  It is a picture of my husband and daughter.  My husband is a terrific father and we have an amazing little girl who has made enormous strides over the past nearly three years of her life. 

Today, we shared the news of our adoption plans with our respective parents.  We were thrilled to hear my husband's family support and encourage us.  My parents are generally more guarded and more questioning, but I know they support us and will be a source of strength.

I am thinking today about 1 John 3:17-18:

"If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?  Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth."

Even as a child, I was taught by my parents to care for those less fortunate and show compassion to those in need.  As a adult, our family has embraced this message in our committment to sponsor three children (two through Compassion International) and give as generously as we are able to the needs of others. 

While our adoption efforts reflect the spirit of this passage, it is by no means the sole reason we have chosen to add a son from Bulgaria to our family.  This would not be fair to him, or to us.  Not everyone is called to adopt.  Not everyone is able to adopt. A child who comes from an institution has needs that must be met, and those who feel moved to help those children must be prepared (as best they can be) to accept and nurture that child's particular needs.  There are some families that are capable of doing this.  For those families, they must heed the call of John and  "let us not love with words or speech but with actions". 

The son we are praying for celebrated his second birthday in Bulgaria in November.  He is a son of a mother who has delivered four other children, and was relinquished shortly after his birth.  He was born prematurely, and has suffered numerous colds, infections, and other maladies of institutional life.  At his birth, he had a hydrocephalus that has since resolved. His suffers with crossed eyes and a heart murmur.  Of course, he also has social and developmental delays.  Right now, he resides in one of the worst orphanages in Bulgaria, with little personal stimulation or care.  His life story is currently written with echoes of despair and hopelessness, with little hope for a positive future.

Our decision to adopt him has torn the pages out of that life story and rewritten it completely.  He cannot know what we are doing at this moment to bring him home.  It is strange to consider that he doesn't know about a decision that two people made in the family room of their home which has changed his life.  It is also sad, even in the midst of joy.  This is a Bulgarian child who will not be able to grow up in Bulgaria.  This is a child who was rejected by his primary caregiver and may never know her or his birth siblings.  There is loss in adoption, and even as we rejoice to adopt him and pray for him, we understand that there is loss.  He will not grow to hear his native language spoken commonly, he will not live among those who look like him, and he will not live among his birth culture.  Although we fervently believe that the life we're working to provide him will be better than the life he leaves, the story of adoption is sad.  We feel sad for him, and we pray for his birth family. 

Very shortly, I will be able to share a photograph of him (one) so that you can put a face to the little boy we are working so hard to bring home.  Till then, here is a photo of the cutest little girl you've ever seen, our dear Chelsea.  She was at a museum and is wearing the smock provided to her there. 

1 comment:

  1. Congratulations Jennifer!! Chelsea is a cutie!! (((HUGS))) and prayers!


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